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Got Problems?
Carl Jung, the late psychologist, said that the greatest problems in our lives cannot be solved -- but that we can only outgrow them by finding something greater than the original issue and create what we truly want. Over time as our dream comes to life, the original problem diminishes in magnitude.
Let’s take credit card debt for example. Imagine you are $20,000 in debt and paying the minimum. Your solution may be to eat out less, cut back on entertainment and find a second job. The money saved and earned is then used to increase the monthly payments. After 3 years, you’ve reduced your debt to $5,000. That’s quite an achievement, and after living an austere life for several years, you want to reward yourself for being good. So you take a long deserved vacation and buy a newer car to replace the old clunker. All of a sudden your debt shoots up to $13,000. You feel demoralized. On the other hand, say you do pay it all off after 4 years. That’s great but you’re still no closer to creating your big life goals because you’ve been too busy in survival mode.
However, let’s take a different approach. Rather than focusing on the problem (debt) you go after your dream of starting your own business. (Of course, you need to be responsible and pay more than minimum payments and not spend recklessly.) As the business takes off and more income flows in, you can apply that to paying off the debt. After some time and it may take longer, the debt is paid off but more importantly you’ve achieved your goal of having your own thriving business.
If you’re not used to creating abundance in your life, you’ll stay focused on problem solving, and miss opportunities to create your dream along the way. It’s exhausting to constantly put out fires in your life. An empowerment coach assists you to manifest abundance by not placing focus on problems but rather on your life fulfilling goals.
Q and A
I work for a boss who is a tyrant. His leadership style is to motivate his employees through threats and intimidation. The stress has caused me to become sick a number of times and it feels like my stomach is constantly in knots. I dread going to work and I’m seriously considering quitting even in this poor job market. Do you have any suggestions?
--Phil
Your situation can easily do harm to your confidence and esteem. Before you quit voice yourself to the boss. Without blaming or criticizing his leadership style, say how you feel and what it’s creating within you. For example, “When I’m spoken to in a raised tone, it causes me to tense up. The fear of not meeting expectation causes me to not be as effective as I can be. I want to do my work well and be a good employee, but to do that I ask that I be spoken to in a more encouraging way.”
There were no threats of quitting or attacks on his character. By saying what’s going on inside of you, it allows you to stand up for yourself and maintain your dignity. Your boss may listen to you or he may not. But at least you had the courage to speak up and didn’t relinquish your power to him. If he doesn’t support you, say that you’ve said what you needed to say and leave his office. At this point, you can decide whether to stay or leave the company.
The more you’re able to voice yourself in all aspects of life the more confidence and self-worth you’ll develop.
Fierce First Step assists people in attaining their goals in relationship, work and purpose. We help clients uncover the issues that may hold them back from fulfilling these goals. We then provide guidance along with the necessary skills and tools to bring their goals to fruition.
For more information about Fierce First Step and the services offered please view our website at www.fiercefirststep.com or call 415-294-4451.
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